9 Great Ways To Form A Bond With Baby And Its Importance
Sing, skin-to-skin contact, or dance--make every moment with your baby special.
Dr. Nisha Khanna has nearly two decades of experience as a mental health professional. Based out of New Delhi, she has provided consultation to more than 30,000 individuals so far. She is a regular face on television and in news magazines. Dr. Khanna is a Certified Marriage and Family Therapist, having done her training course in Marriage and Family Therapy from NIMHANS, Bangalore.
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In This Article
The bond new parents share with their newborns is magical. Although mothers forge a lifelong bond with their baby during pregnancy, the attachment and affection get deeper over time. Your search for fun ways to bond with the baby ends here.
A parent’s love for their children is unconditional. While most parents bond with the little human instantly, it may take a bit longer for a few. This post brings you some cute ways to bond with your newborn.
Importance Of Bonding With Baby
Bonding between parents and the newborn is essential for a baby’s emotional, physical, and psychological development. It sets the right foundation for the child’s well being. Bonding is a steady process that takes time. It gives a sense of protection to the little one and develops an attachment.
When you smile, hug, touch, and even talk to the newborn, they start understanding your love, affection, and care. With time, they develop thought, language, and memory. Newborns depend entirely on their parents to cuddle, give them warmth, and fulfill their needs. Rocking them to sleep, touching them, looking into their eyes, and feeding them builds a rapport and communication that strengthens the bond.
Some parents may experience delayed or slow bonding with their babies. That’s a temporary phase, and we tell you about it in the latter part of the article. Keep reading to know about a few ways to improve the bonding of parents well with their little ones.
Ways To Bond With Your Baby
Mothers and fathers can incorporate these ways into their routine and notice improved bonding with the baby.
1. Skin-to-skin contact
Your baby can feel and sense your touch. Keeping them constantly close to you helps to relax and calm. You can cuddle your baby, hold hands, rock on the back, and hold to your chest — all these releases oxytocin, which reduces stress levels, maintains heart rate, and stabilizes body temperature (1) (2).
2. Breastfeeding
According to the American Psychological Association, babies who were breastfeeding longer have shown maternal sensitivity (3). It keeps your baby close to you, nourishes them, and senses your touch, smell, and sound. Soothe talking while breastfeeding also comforts the baby, thereby developing a positive bond.
3. Baby massage
Massaging is a natural way to develop a sense of eye contact and touch that improves the bonding between a baby and mother. Regular massaging improves the weight and mental-motor development of the child. It also regulates the baby’s respiration and sleep, and reduces stress and colic (4).
4. Talk and sing
Talking and singing help a baby connect positively with the parents. More than talking, singing improves the overall health, enhances social bond, and keeps the baby calm. In fact, babies are known to recognize their mother’s voice earlier than they identify face (5). Even the father can do the same and connect well with the little one.
5. Baby wearing
Keeping your baby close by wearing them in a carrier, wrap, or sling calms the baby, regulates heat, maintains breathing and heart rate, thereby promoting bonding (6). It also helps the baby identify your smell and touch, and they know you are always there for them. Both mother and father should wear the baby to improve the parent-baby bond.
6. Eye contact and smile
When mothers and fathers smile, looking at the baby, and making eye contact when talking to them creates a meaningful and special bond and makes the baby understand what parents are trying to say. Eventually, babies also learn to communicate with their parents.
7. Rock and dance
Babies identify rhythmic sounds and music. According to a study, musical therapy improves the baby-parent interaction to a great extent. They clap, make leg movements, sway, and try to dance. You can rock your baby when sleeping, bounce on a ball, soothe, and play with them to improve bonding.
8. Make routines
Babies identify the routines. For instance, when you have set feeding time, playing time, or singing time, they tend to get along with it. They react and make movements to tell you something. Examine their behavior and understand them. Figure out what they like and dislike. And soon, your bonding will develop.
9. Sleep with the baby
When babies sleep with mothers, they have a calming effect. They feel protected even when they wake up at night. And touching and breastfeeding your baby when they are sleeping or falling asleep, develops positive bonding.
Why Is It Difficult For Some Parents To Bond?
It’s absolutely okay if you are unable to connect with your baby immediately. As already said, bonding is a process, and some parents may take days, weeks, or even months to get attached to their baby.
- Postpartum depression is one of the reasons affecting the bond between mother and child. When she is depressed, she might be neglecting herself and may not connect emotionally with her child (7).
- Painful and exhaustive labor for some women could be a reason for delayed bonding. Long labor and stressful time are tiresome, and it may take some time to connect with the baby.
- Less sleep and breastfeeding could be responsible factors affecting the bonding between mother and baby (8).
- Some times when the person is not mentally and financially ready to take the responsibility of child but have the baby for reasons such as keeping the marriage in tact.
Frequently Asked Questions
1. How long does it take to bond with a baby?
Bonding may occur immediately after the baby’s birth. However, some parents may take longer to develop a special bond with their babies, and it is perfectly normal. Bonding in such cases may happen gradually over the baby’s first year of life (9).
2. Are babies more attached to their mothers?
Babies usually bond first with their mothers and form a primary attachment as the baby’s interactions are more with them as the primary caregiver.
It is important that you develop a strong bond with your baby as it helps with their social, emotional, and psychological development as well. However, you should remember that the process of developing a bond takes time, and it varies from one baby to another. Having as much skin-to-skin contact as possible, wearing your baby, breastfeeding, and sleeping with them are some ways by which you can develop a bond with your little one. But it is also essential that you have patience throughout the process and believe that you will have a loving bond with your baby over time.
Key Pointers
- Breastfeeding and skin-to-skin contact establish a bond between the mother and her baby.
- Holding, massaging, making eye contact, talking, or singing to them can bring the baby closer to people around them.
- Sleeplessness, postpartum depression, pain, and other issues after labor are major roadblocks for bonding between the mother and the baby.
References
2. R. Moore et al.; Early skin-to-skin contact for mothers and their healthy newborn infants; US National Library of Medicine (2014)
3. M. Weaver; Bonding Benefits of Breastfeeding Extend Years Beyond Infancy; American Psychological Association (2017)
4. Gürol’s; The Effects of Baby Massage on Attachment between Mother and their Infants; Asian Nursing Research (2012)
5. Suttie; Why Parents Sing to Babies; Berkeley University of California (2016)
6. B. Moran; Keeping Them Close: A Qualitative Examination of Mothers’ Perceptions, Motivations, and Experiences with Babywearing; University of Tennessee (2017)
7. Depression during pregnancy and after; Harvard Health Publishing (2017)
8. Cabotage; Why bonding with your baby can be surprisingly difficult; University of Washington (2019)
9. Bonding With Your Newborn: What to Know If You Don’t Feel Connected Right Away; ACOG
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