Does Love Happen Only Once? Why “Maybe” Isn’t The Right Answer
Jayant is passionate writer and editor.
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It is one of our greatest fears has always been this one question – does love happen only once? That fear that we’re only going to fall in love once in our lives, and then comes the apprehension, saying we better not mess it up! Or even worse, we fell in love, thought the other person was definitely the one for us, and everything was great until they weren’t so great any more, we fell out of love, and then felt terribly guilty and awful about the whole thing because we ended up ruining our moment of love, right?
What Is Love?
Is love something like that? Does love happen only once, like always? Is it like a box you can’t cut out of? Wrong! Love is complex and beautiful and all powerful and can overcome even death in its quest to satiate the soul and convince it that existence isn’t merely out of compulsion and instinct, that there is more to life and a higher connection can be forged that makes it all worthwhile and then some. Do you think such a thing will be found the first time you go looking for it? Didn’t think so.
[Read More: Does True Love Exist? 7 Facts That Scream “Yes!”]
That’s not to say that it doesn’t happen. Many people fall in love for the first time and that’s the only time they need to stay true to “til death do us part.” On the other hand, several people go through three marriages before they come across someone that they can say truly completes them and makes them feel like the most special person on earth.
Keep Looking
If the people in the second category had given up on love after the first time they had experienced disappointment, they would not have met that special someone who makes them believe in true love and soul-mates. Instead, they would be stuck in a relationship that is taking more out of them than it’s worth, and would be dejected that they blew their one and only chance at love! Does love happen only once, even if it’s still love when it happens again?
A Key Difference
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It is important to understand here the difference between the person giving you one chance only and love giving you one (more) chance. Sometimes a certain person that you once loved might have given you just once chance before you blew it up. If you happen to lose their trust one time then they are not likely to give you another shot at winning their love. This may happen because of your mistake, or something completely out of your control, but it’s very important to understand here that them giving you only one chance (whatever their reason, no need to dwell on understanding it) does not mean that love is only giving you one chance.
It’s In Your Hands
And finally, understand that ultimately when it comes to finding love for a second or third time or fourth or more is entirely in your hands. Take the case of a loving wife who lost her husband of 10 years to cancer at a very young age (both for her and the unfortunate husband). She was absolutely devastated by his passing and was a young widow who was still hopelessly in love with her husband. Time passed, wounds healed and the love remained.
Now if she chooses to look for one again, no one will begrudge her. In fact, it would be encouraged for her to move on and find happiness in another person again. On the other hand, should she choose to not pursue another relationship because the 10 years that she spent with there husband was everything she ever wanted and more? It doesn’t mean that there isn’t someone out there for her, it means that she’s not looking for it at the moment – and that’s okay too!
[Read More: How To Love Someone Deeply: 7 Steps]
So be open and let go of things if they didn’t work out fine. Maybe, just maybe, the answer to that question, does love happen only once?, is just as humane as the hearts that are touched by such a deep emotion. Maybe Love doesn’t have to happen only once. You will never know unless you look for it again.
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