Emotional Abuse In Children – Everything You Need To Know

Are you worried about the sudden change in your child’s behavior? Do you want to reach out to your child but find an emotional disconnect with him? Is it often difficult for you to understand your child’s mood swings and are worried if your disciplinarian approach triggered it? Have you heard of the term emotional child abuse and want to know if unknowingly you or someone else close to your child could be causing it?

If you are looking for answers to any of the above, scroll down to find out more about what is emotional abuse and how you can spot and prevent it in your child.

What Is Emotional Child Abuse?

In many cases, emotional abuse is a form of constant emotional maltreatment or neglect that your child feels subjected to, either by you or someone else close to him. Emotional or psychological abuse can cause some very serious damage to your child’s cognitive, emotional, social, and psychological development. Sometimes, the parent or the caregiver will emotionally abuse the child knowing very well what the consequences can be. At other times, parents or caregivers can subject the child to emotional abuse without realizing what they are doing.

[ Read: Factors That Affect The Emotional Development In Children ]

What Are The Different Types Of Emotional Abuse In Children?

Here are a few situations that can make your child suffer from emotional abuse:

1. Ignoring Your Child:

• You may be ignoring your child when you, or the main caregiver, are not present with him most of the times, to such an extent that he starts feeling lonely.

• Also, in some situations, you may be physically present with your child, but may not be paying any attention to him.

• Other situations in which your child may feel ignored are if you avoid making eye contact while speaking to him or do not frequently address him by name.

2. Rejecting Your Child’s Needs:

• Rejecting your child’s needs could mean something as simple as ridiculing your child in front of others, which could seem a small incident to you at the time, but can have a grave and long-lasting consequence.

• You may regularly refuse to respond to your child’s simple physical needs by not touching or hugging him. You may also be rejecting his basic needs and wants.

3. Keeping Your Child In Isolation:

• Keeping your child in isolation means that you regularly prevent your child from being in touch with his friends or peers. It could also mean a situation where you prevent your child from having regular social interactions with other family members or adults.

• Keeping your child in isolation will also refer to those times when you may choose to limit your child’s freedom of movement, often in the way of keeping him grounded as a punishment. While many parents do punish their child by confining them, it can become a form of emotional abuse for the child if it is too frequent.

4. Exploiting Or Corrupting The Child By Manipulating Him:

• If your child is suffering from the exploitative or corrupt form of emotional abuse, someone may be teaching or encouraging him to take part in activities that are inappropriate or even illegal.

• In some cases, your child may also be forced into the same, sometimes without your knowledge.

• Exploitative or corrupt forms of emotional abuse could involve behavior from the parent or the main caregiver that is antisocial or self-destructive. It could encourage risky behavior in the child by forcing him to lie or steal or get involved in flesh trade.

5. Verbal Assault And Abuse:

• The verbal form of emotional abuse of a child can also have a very strong and long-lasting effect on him.

• A verbal assault could involve ridiculing, shaming, belittling the child on a regular basis. It could also involve a situation in which someone verbally threatens your child.

[ Read: Effects Of Verbal Abuse On Children ]

6. Terrorizing The Child:

• When a child feels terrorized as a form of emotional abuse, it means that the parent or caregiver threaten or bully the child to make him obey.

• A parent or a caregiver can threaten or bully the child in various ways. It could be an act that puts the child in a dangerous or uncomfortable situation. It could also be an act of separating him from his favorite pet or toy or even a sibling until he complies.

• In many cases, the child can feel terrorized or bullied when the parent or caregiver put unrealistic expectations in front of him. He may fear dangerous consequences if he does not meet the expectations.

7. Neglecting The Child:

• Neglecting the child can take on many forms such as not concentrating on the child’s educational needs. It means a situation in which the parent cannot or does not provide the child with the resources required for educational services.

• A child can also suffer from emotional abuse in the form of mental neglect. It is a situation in which the parent or the caregiver deny or ignore the child’s need for treatment that can help him overcome serious mental problems.

• The third form of neglect could be when a parent or caregiver refuses to acknowledge the child’s need for medical treatment.

While it may seem that many forms of child emotional abuse are part of common parenting techniques. However, they can transform into emotional abuse when they affect a child adversely due to frequent practice. For instance, it is perfectly normal for you to keep your child grounded as part of a punishment, as long as it is not a regular, everyday habit. Your child should understand the reason for the punishment and should not perceive it as an irrational and compulsive behavior on your part.

[ Read: Emotional Disorders In Children ]

Why Does Emotional Abuse Happen?

Health experts and child psychologists agree that children from different families can face emotional abuse. As a parent, you always want the best for your child, but sometimes, there can be situations that may force you to adopt a strict or harsh approach. There are many factors that could lead to emotional abuse of children by the parent or the caregiver. Some such factors that could have an important role to play are:

• Stress

• Paucity of time due to official commitments

• Insufficient resources

• Poor parenting skills

• Isolation in society

• Unnatural expectations from the child

Also, in some cases, a parent or caregiver can emotionally abuse a child due to a similar experience, thus creating a vicious cycle.

[ Read: Influence of Parenting on Children ]

What Are The Symptoms Of Child Abuse?

Here are a few physical signs of emotional abuse in children:

• Your child will suddenly start wetting or soiling the bed. Also, there will be no medical reason for the same.

• Your child will regularly start having various psychosomatic complaints, such as headaches, nausea or even pain in the abdomen. However, his medical reports will be more or less normal or inconclusive.

• If your child is suffering from emotional abuse, he may have bouts of diarrhea and vomiting that may last for weeks or even months.

• If your child is going through emotional abuse, you may notice some significant delays in reaching various developmental milestones.

• A common symptom of emotional abuse in children is the need to feel and look different. Your child may suddenly start dressing up very differently from his usual style. He may also dress inappropriately at various events or places.

[ Read: Tips To Handle A Highly Sensitive Child ]

Here are a few social symptoms of emotional abuse in children that your little one will display:

• Your child may show a significant lack in various areas of development.

• You will notice that your child is quieter than usual, and can get startled at the slightest of noises or even by familiar voices. He may become a recluse and refuse to interact with people or maintain eye contact while talking. All these withdrawal symptoms could be early signs of depression, anxiety, fear, trauma or even aggression.

• If your child has been the victim of emotional abuse, you may notice severe and often difficult to control symptoms of self-destruction in him. He may display suicidal tendencies or various risky behaviors such as drug or alcohol abuse.

• In a complete contrast to the above symptoms, if your child is going through emotional abuse, you may also notice a behavior in which he becomes overly compliant and agrees to everything that you say. Your child may suddenly be too well-mannered and polite or may look too neat and clean.

• When your child is suffering from emotional abuse, you may notice a constant need in your child to try and get your or the main caregiver’s attention. On the contrary, your child may become extremely inhibited or uncharacteristically shy.

• A very easy way of spotting if your child is facing emotional abuse is by watching him during his playtime. Most children copy the negative behaviors or language that they see or face at home. If you see your child displaying a behavior or mouthing words that you feel are inappropriate for his age, it could be a sign of emotional abuse.

How Can You Spot An Emotionally Abusive Behavior In Adults?

Here are a few ways in which you can spot whether or not an adult is emotionally abusing a child:

• The adult will always call the child names and ridicule him in front of others. The adult may also label the child in a certain way that may be demeaning or inappropriate.

• In some instances, the adult may be verbally threatening towards the child. The adult may raise his voice in front of the child or could threaten him in clear words of some physical harm. In some cases, the adult can also force the child to watch an act of violence or physical harm to someone or something that he loves.

• The adult can emotionally abuse a child when he has unrealistic expectations from him.

• In certain cases, the adult will also inflict emotional abuse on the child by involving him in custodial, visitation or access issues during a divorce proceeding.

A Few Facts On Emotional Abuse In Children:

Here are a few shocking facts about emotional abuse in children:

• Almost 90 percent of all child deaths are a result of instigation by family members or close associates.

• Children who are victims of abuse have a 25 percent higher risk of suffering from various health and mental issues.

• Children who suffer from emotional abuse are prone to- teen pregnancy, delinquent behavior, dropping out of school, and substance abuse.

[ Read: Tips To Understand Child’s Psychology ]

Tips To Prevent Emotional Abuse:

As a parent or caregiver, it may be true that you love your child or ward, but it can also be true that you do end up making him suffer from emotional abuse unknowingly. It is true that even model parents yell at their children or ignore them sometimes. When such instances happen as a one-off behavior, it is not abusive in any way. However, the risk of emotional abuse starts to emerge when this type of behavior turns into a regular habit.

While emotional abuse to child can happen in any family with any background, there are some situations that can trigger it. Here are some situations that could increase the risk of emotional abuse:

• A family that is going through financial difficulties will find it difficult to take care of the child’s academic as well as other basic needs. A child in such a family is likely to face emotional abuse.

• A single parent may feel unduly burdened with all the care and responsibility of the child. He may vent his frustration on the child and thereby emotionally abuse him.

• A child is also at a higher risk of being subjected to emotional abuse in case there is a separation or divorce in the family. In such a situation, both the parents may be busy with the proceedings and may emotionally neglect the child.

[ Read: Tips To Strengthen Parent Child Bonding ]

Being a parent or caring for a child is certainly a huge responsibility that demands a lot of patience. It is possible that while you may yell at your child or ignore him temporarily with his best interests in mind, the results may not always be satisfactory. If you feel that you are somehow emotionally abusing your child, it is important to seek an appointment with a counselor. He can help you prevent an emotionally abusive behavior. For example, if you think your negative approach is due to your dependency on alcohol or drugs, getting the right treatment will help you kick the habit and change your overall outlook and behavior. It can also help you improve your attitude towards parenting your child.

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