84 Funny Halloween Jokes For Kids
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Are you looking for some kid-friendly Halloween jokes to bring a smile to your kid’s frightened face? Or is he insisting you for some latest Halloween jokes that he can tell while going “trick or treat”? If you’ve nodded along, then you should check out our collection of 84 Halloween jokes for klids!
For kids all across the globe, Halloween is dressing up as their favorite princess and superhero, late bedtime stories, and consuming loads and loads of chocolates and candies. Besides, there is also a tradition of going door to door, chanting “trick or treat” in exchange for sweets. But some parts of the world call for kids telling jokes! And we personally love this version of tricking. It’s fun for one and all. From scary to funny and everything in between, here are 84 of our funny halloween jokes for kids that will tickle everyone’s bones.
Read on the best halloween jokes for kids:
Joke 1:
Q. What does Dracula say when he doesn’t have good news?
A. “I have BAT news, everyone!”
Joke 2:
Q. Why can’t you tell a skeleton a secret?
A. Because it goes in one ear and comes out from the other.
Joke 3:
What did the ghost teacher say to her class?
A. “Watch the board and I’ll go through it again.”
[ Read: Halloween Quotes And Poems For Kids ]
Joke 4:
Q. What did the witch have for snack?
A. A sandwitch.
Joke 5:
Q. Why did the vampires cancel the baseball game?
A. Because they couldn’t find their bats.
Joke 6:
Q. You are dreaming. A monster comes up to you and takes you away. He puts you in an oven and turns it on. Any moment he will be eating you. What should you do?
A. Pinch yourself.
Joke 7:
Q. Why did the skeleton go scuba diving?
A. Because he wanted to get some muscles!
Joke 8:
Q. What did the mommy ghost say to the noisy young ghost who kept interrupting?
A. “Spook when you’re spooken to.”
Joke 9:
Monster: It is a very hot day today!
Witch: So, can I make you a lemonade?
Monster: Yes!
Witch: Poof! You’re lemonade!
Joke 10:
Patient: Doctor, I think that I’ve been bitten by a vampire.
Doctor: Drink this glass of water.
Patient: Will it make me better?
Doctor: No, but I’ll be able to see if your neck leaks.
Joke 11:
A skeleton walks into a bar. He goes to the bartender and says, “I’m going to need a beer and a mop.”
Joke 12:
Q. Why didn’t the mummy have any friends?
A. Because he was wrapped up in himself!
Joke 13:
Q. What do witches put on their bagels?
A. Scream cheese!
Joke 14:
Q. Why did the skeleton go to the party alone?
A. Because he couldn’t find any body to go with him!
Joke 15:
Q. What do you get if you divide the circumference of a jack-o-lantern by its diameter?
A. Pumpkin pi!
Joke 16:
Q. Why is a cemetery a great place to write a story?
A. Because there are so many plots there!
Joke 17:
Q. Where do baby ghosts go during the day?
A. Dayscare!
Joke 18:
Q. Where do mummies go for a swim?
A. To the dead sea
Joke 19:
Q. Why don’t mummies take vacations?
A. They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind.
Joke 20:
Q. Why did Dracula’s mother give him cough medicine?
A. Because he was having a coffin fit.
Joke 21:
Q. Who was the most famous French skeleton?
A. Napoleon bone-apart.
[ Read: Scary Halloween Stories For Kids ]
Joke 22:
It was mid-October and I was waiting for my wife, Julie, at the checkout at the supermarket in Worcester, USA, I noticed that someone had left behind their broom.
When no one came to claim it, I went outside to search for a couple I remembered seeing at the cashier’s desk. I spotted them getting into their truck and hurried over.
‘Excuse me,’ I said to the young woman, ‘but did you by any chance leave your broom inside?’
‘No,’ she retorted quickly and with a smile, ‘we came by truck.’
Joke 23:
Q: What did the vampire say about the Dracula movie?
A: It was fang-tastic!
Joke 24:
Q: What subject in school is easy for a witch?
A: Spell-ing
Joke 25:
Q: Do you know how to make a witch itch?
A: You take away the w!
Joke 26:
Q: What did the boy ghost say to the girl ghost?
A: You sure are Boo-tiful!
Joke 27:
Q: Why didn’t the skeleton cross the road?
A: He didn’t have the guts!
Joke 28:
Q: What is a scarecrows favorite fruit?
A: Straw-berries!
Joke 29:
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Lettuce.
Lettuce who?
Lettuce try again next Halloween!
Joke 30:
Q: How does Frankenstein jump start his day?
A: With a shock of lighting!
Joke 31:
Q: What do ghosts eat for supper?
A: Spooketi
Joke 32:
Q. What do you call two witches sharing an apartment?
A. Broom-mates!
Joke 33:
“Mommy, everyone says I look like a werewolf.”
“Please be quiet and comb your face.”
Joke 34:
Q: What do moms dress up as on Halloween?
A: Mummies!
Joke 35:
Q: What goes around a haunted house and never stops?
A: A fence.
Joke 36:
Q: What is a ghost’s favorite pie?
A: Booberry pie!
Joke 37:
Q: Where do ghosts buy their food?
A: At the ghost-ery store!
Joke 38:
Q: What’s a haunted chicken?
A: A poultry-geist!
Joke 39:
Knock Knock!
Who’s there? Imogen.
Imogen who?
Imogen life without Halloween chocolate!
[ Read: Scary Halloween Poems For Kids ]
Joke 40:
Q: What room is useless for a ghost?
A: A living room!
Joke 41:
Q: What position does a ghost play in soccer?
A: Ghoulie!
Joke 42:
Q: What breed of dog does Dracula have?
A: A bloodhound!
Joke 43:
Q: What do you call a skeleton that lies in its grave?
A: Lazy bones!
Joke 44:
Q: Why did the Cyclops stop teaching?
A: Because he only had one pupil!
Joke 45:
Q: What do you get when you cross a teacher and a vampire?
A: A blood test!
Joke 46:
Q: Where did the ghost go on vacation?
A: The BOO-hamas!
Joke 47:
Q: What do sea monsters eat for lunch?
A: Fish and ships!
Joke 48:
Q: Where does Dracula keep his money?
A: In a blood bank!
Joke 49:
Q: What did the jack-o’-lantern say to the other jack-o’-lantern when they were on their way to a Halloween party?
A: “Let’s get glowing.”
Joke 50:
Q: Why are graveyards noisy?
A: Because of all the coffin!
Joke 51:
Q. Where does Count Dracula usually eat his lunch?
A. At the casketeria.
Joke 52:
Q. What do you call a witch who likes the beach, but is scared of the water?
A. A chicken sand witch.
Joke 53:
Q. What do you get when you cross a vampire with a mummy?
A. Either a flying bandage or a gift wrapped bat!
Joke 54:
Q. What should a short-sighted ghost have?
A. Spooktacles!
Joke 55:
Q. What tops off a ghost’s ice cream sundae?
A. Whipped scream.
Joke 56:
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
BooBoo who?
Oh, I’m sorry….I didn’t mean to make you cry!
Joke 57:
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?
Witch.
Witch who?
Witch one of you can fix my broomstick?
Joke 58:
Q: What did one of Frankenstein’s ears say to the other?
A: I didn’t know we lived on the same block!
Joke 59:
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Butter!
Butter who?
Butter open quick, I have a funny Halloween joke to tell you!
[ Read: Halloween Games For Kids ]
Joke 60:
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Doughnut!
Doughnut who?
Doughnut worry it is just a Halloween joke!
Joke 61:
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Vampire!
Vampire who?
Vampire state building!
Joke 62:
Q. What do you get if you cross a vampire with Al Capone?
A. A fangster !
Joke 63:
Q. What sort of group do vampires join?
A. A blood group!
Joke 64:
Q. What happened when the wizard turned a boy into a hare?
A. He’s still rabbiting on about it!
Joke 65:
Q. Why did the witch travel on a broom?
A. She couldn’t afford a vacuum cleaner!
Joke 66:
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Abbott.
Abbott, who?
Abbott time you opened this door!
Joke 67:
Q. What happened when the cannibals ate a comedian?
A. They had a feast of fun!
Joke 68:
Q. What do demons have for breakfast?
A. Devilled eggs!
Joke 69:
Q. How can you tell if a corpse is angry?
A. It flips its lid!
Joke 70:
Q. What do witches eat at Halloween ?
A. Spooketti, halloweenies, devils food cake and booberry pie !
Joke 71:
Knock Knock!
Who’s there?
Howl!
Howl who?
Howl you know unless you open the door!
Joke 72:
Q. Why did the wizard wear a yellow robe to the Halloween party?
A. He was going as a banana!
Joke 73:
Q. How did the witch almost lose her baby?
A. She didn’t take it far enough into the woods!
Joke 74:
Q. Why did the small werewolf bite the woman’s ankle?
A. Because he couldn’t reach any higher!
Joke 75:
Q. What do vampires have at eleven o’clock every day?
A. A coffin break!
Joke 76:
Q: Where do unbaptized baby ghosts go?
A: Not Heaven.
Joke 77:
Q. Why don’t vampires have friends?
A. Because they’re pains in the neck.
Joke 78:
Knock knock.
Who’s there?
Phillip.
Phillip, who?
Phillip my bag with candy.
Joke 79:
Q. How do you know that carrots are good for your eyesight?
A. Have you ever seen a rabbit wearing glasses?
[ Read: Best Halloween Movies For Kids ]
Joke 80:
Q. Why does a cemetery have to keep a fence around it?
A. Because people are dying to get in
Joke 81:
Q. Why was the little boy unhappy to win first prize for the best costume at the Halloween party?
A. Because he came to pick up his sister.
Joke 82:
Q. What is a Mummy’s favourite type of music?
A. Wrap!!!
Joke 83:
Q. What do skeletons say before a meal?
A. Bone appetit!
Joke 84:
Q. Where does a witch park her vehicle?
A. In the broom closet!
Children and guests will go rolling around in laughter with these kid Halloween jokes. While your kids are cracking these jokes, print out our Halloween coloring pages here. And share a few of your favorite Halloween jokes in the comment section below!
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