10 Tips To Find Yourself When You Are Feeling Lost

Written by Harini Natarajan, BE, PGDBM, Certified Professional Life Coach Harini Natarajan BE, PGDBM, Certified Professional Life Coach Experience: 17 years
Last Updated on

The greatest and most important purpose of our lives is to discover who we truly are. So many of us go through life not really knowing ourselves. Some of us are so busy listening to the awful inner critic that feeds us all the wrong notions about ourselves. We carry on living life without asking the biggest question that has plagued mankind since inception – who am I?

You may feel that finding yourself maybe a self-centered goal, but is it really? To be a valuable human in society and the best partner, parent, and child, we first have to know who we are. We need to be aware of what we have to offer and what we value. This is a personal journey every individual will benefit from embarking on.

“What is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life?” – Mary Oliver

What if you had a perfectly peaceful life, and suddenly, because of a situational change, find yourself struggling mentally and spiritually? Whether you are feeling lost because of your relationship, job, or as a parent, or simply feeling lost in life, you have to remember this – you are not alone. Just because you are having a hard day, month, or year, it doesn’t mean your life is over and that you will never find happiness or yourself again. Life gets hard when you are meant to go through a transformation period. The secret is not to get stuck in your current lost state and use your creative power and positivity to create the life you want to live. You need to hunt for several ways to find yourself again.

Here are a few tips that will help you pull yourself out of this lost state and to find yourself. They will remind you that you have the power to create a life you will love to live.

1. Go On A Soul Searching Adventure

Whether it is hiking in the forest, a week-long drive along the coast, or a solitary retreat, go out and explore the wonderful world. This will give you the focus and time you need to reconnect with yourself again. You will be away from the disturbing noise of your daily life. You will get a chance to experience the world again, with fresh eyes.
However, don’t embark on this journey by going out with toxic people or putting toxic substances in your body that will alter your ability to decipher things. When you come back, you will find that you have far more clarity than you had when you embarked on this soul searching adventure.

2. Do Things You Used To Love To Do

Do Things You Used To Love To Do
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Do you remember the last time you laughed your heart out? Do you remember when things were not complicated and situations not depressing? It is not that things have changed drastically – it is likely because you were completely engrossed in enjoying the moment and didn’t much care about the hardships of life.

As we age, we lose sight of how beautiful life is. We take it upon ourselves to feel bored because of the mundane parts of life and are burdened by its responsibilities. If you are feeling lost, it is time to reconnect with who you are and what you love. Don’t make excuses about not having the money, resources, or time. People make time for things they think are important. Make a commitment to yourself to do what you love and watch your life change for the better.

3. Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone

Get Out Of Your Comfort Zone
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It’s time to get uncomfortable! Yes, you read it right! You need to push yourself out of your comfort zone by meeting new people and trying new things. Growth doesn’t happen on its own. You can’t stay in your comfortable bubble, where everything is familiar, and expect life to be exciting.

Challenge yourself. Do something that is mildly terrifying, yet invigorating at the same time – something that makes you feel alive. Stretch yourself just enough so that you continue to evolve and grow. What’s the first thing you thought of when you read the word terrifying? Go and do that!

4. Dream Big

Dream Big
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Remember the dreams you had before you lost touch with them as life went on? Do you think that they are impossible, improbable, or childish because of who you are today? Grab a journal and write down the dreams you once had for yourself. Better yet, see new ones.

If you could be whoever you wanted, what would you be? What would you like to achieve? What would you like to do? What exactly is your soul aching for? When you reconnect with your dreams, you will once again have the inspiration and desire to take action towards achieving them. You will suddenly realize you have found yourself again.

5. Be Quiet And Listen

Be Quiet And Listen
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There are messages, signs, and guideposts that the universe has laid out for you. They will inspire you to better yourself, but you can only hear or see them when your heart and eyes are open. With all the constant mind chatter we have nowadays, it can be difficult to understand and decipher the signs that are all around us. So, be quiet and listen.

Pay close attention to the songs on the radio, signs on the road, and the people you meet. They are all messengers who will help you move forward in life.

6. Ask For Help If You Need It

Ask For Help If You Need It
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There are numerous people whose purpose in life is to help people who are lost. Reach out to them and ask for help. It could be a religious figure, life coach, mentor, counselor, a psychologist, a friend, or a teacher – whoever you feel comfortable with.

You don’t have to figure life out all on your own. Sometimes, even talking to someone sensible can provide you the insight you need. Conversation is one of the methods through which we gain knowledge and expand our horizons.

7. Accept That You Have The Ability To Be, Have, And Do Anything You Want

Accept That You Have The Ability To Be, Have, And Do Anything You Want
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Sometimes, you are so consumed with feeling lost that you forget that you can choose how you feel and what you think about. You possess a great amount of power. You have the ability to get the answers you are seeking and create the life you desire. Whether you use want to use affirmations, mantras, yoga, meditation, journaling, or something else is totally up to you.

It is important to focus on the joy and beauty present all around you. When you decide to be happy, the universe sends you more happiness as well as the answers you are seeking.

8. Understand Your Past

Understand Your Past
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To understand who we are and why we behave the way we do, we need to know our own story. Exploring your past is an important step to understanding yourself and becoming who you want to be. It isn’t just the things that happen to us that define who we are, but how much we have made sense of it.

Traumas from our history that are still unresolved affect the ways we act. Painful life experiences generally determine how we defend ourselves after growing up. To break this influence, it is important to acknowledge what is causing us to feel what we feel. We should always look at the source of our self-destructive or self-limiting tendencies.

9. Be Generous And Compassionate

Be Generous And Compassionate
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As Mahatma Gandhi famously said, “The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” To lengthen your lifespan and improve your mental and physical health, you need to practice generosity. It can enhance one’s sense of purpose. It provides more value and meaning to your life.

You can get way more joy from giving than from receiving. It is best to practice generosity and have a compassionate attitude toward others and ourselves. People who care and show concern for others are generally happier.

10. Value Friendship

Value Friendship
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We do not have the power to choose the family we are born into. But we assume that family defines who we are as people. However, we can choose our friends. We have the power to create a family of choice. But we need to be wise about this. We need to seek out people who support us, who are positive, who make us happy, and who inspire us.

This may include people we are related to by blood as well, but it is meant to be a family we have really chosen. This core group of humans has people who are our true friends and allies. This is key to finding ourselves because who we choose to be around has a profound effect on how we perceive life. Having a great support system that believes in us and supports us in reaching our goals leads to development and growth on a personal level.

Become who you want to be. This may sound obvious, but it is certainly something worth noting. You have earned this life, and it is yours – so be yourself and be happy. The idea of unlocking your true potential and finding yourself may seem like a challenge. However, you can rediscover yourself and be who you want to be with the right strategy and focus.

Hope you liked this article. Do share your feedback with us in the comments section below.

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Harini Natarajan
Harini NatarajanHead Of Content Operations
As Head Of Content Operations, Harini sets the tone and editorial direction for StyleCraze to deliver engaging, interesting, and authentic content revolving around women's health, wellness, and beauty. She is a Certified Professional Life Coach from Transformation Academy, a Certified Emotional Intelligence Practitioner from The Priority Academy, and has over 17 years of experience in content writing and editing for online media.

Read full bio of Harini Natarajan
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