How To Stop Liking Someone: 15 Effective Ways To Let Them Go

Keep yourself occupied and set new priorities to shift the focus from someone who doesn't like you back.

Reviewed by Sharon Gilchrest O’Neill, Ed.S., LMFT Sharon Gilchrest O’Neill Sharon Gilchrest O’NeillEd.S., LMFT twitter_iconyoutube_icon Specialty: Marriage & Family TherapyExperience: 8 years
Written by Ratika Pai Ratika Pai
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When you develop feelings for a person, you start imagining your world and your future with them. But what if it doesn’t work out? As painful as it sounds, if our love is not being reciprocated, we might want to learn how to stop liking someone.

It can be a challenging journey, from being rejected to finding a way to stop liking them. But eventually, with some time and help, you can forget them for your good. In this post, we have put together a list of some effective ways to help you move on and learn to stop liking someone.

How To Stop Liking Someone: 15 Effective Ways To Move On Successfully

Liking someone who doesn’t like you back can not only hurt your feelings but also bruise your confidence. If you are facing this situation, don’t worry. We bring you some tips that will help you let go of the attachment and move on.

1. Accept the situation

It is tough to digest that a person rejected you, but you have to swallow the bitter pill. Before you even begin to move past the heartbreak, you should acknowledge the situation. Don’t try to ignore or hide it. Stop hoping that they will change their mind. If they don’t like you, you can’t force them to develop feelings for you. You might try everything in your power to impress them, but it would be a waste of time and effort.

Obsessing and dreaming of getting together would make it harder for you to forget. The best way to move forward is to accept reality and remind yourself about it every day. It will take time, little by little, but eventually, there will be a day when you realize that you haven’t given that person any thought and have moved on.

2. Shift your focus

It is rightly said that an empty mind is a devil’s workshop. If you sit in the corner and mope, you are more likely to think more about the person you like and end up feeling more down. Keeping yourself occupied throughout the day will keep your mind engaged and not give you time to despair.

Pursue a hobby, learn something new, watch something you enjoy, or join a club. Do something you always wanted to do but haven’t done. Indulging in activities that need focus will keep the stressful thoughts at bay and help you move on.

3. Surround yourself with friends and family

If you are distressed, you might isolate from people. The loneliness might drag you down further. Being around your close ones will help you cope with the situation better. It will also keep your mind from straying towards the object of your affection.

Spend some time with friends and family. Go out with them and explore different places. You can take some weight off your heavy heart by sharing your pain with them. Cry if you need to. Talking about it and feeling their love will make you feel upbeat. It will ease your issues and help you heal.

4. Pen down your thoughts

Sometimes, pain can overwhelm us and jumble our thoughts. Penning down can help you declutter. You will also be able to unburden your feelings and sort through them. Maintain a diary and dedicate some time to writing. The activity will help you relax and align your thoughts. At the end of every week, you can glance through them and understand your progress on the healing journey. You can identify when you feel sad during certain times of the day and understand the triggers for these bouts.

5. Take a vacation

Change of scenery will take your mind off the situation. Your usual hangouts might remind you of the person you liked, or you might accidentally run into them. These memories will make it difficult for you to forget them.

Taking a vacation will be refreshing and fill you with positive thoughts and feelings. You can travel with friends or go alone. Going to a different place and meeting new people might give you a fresh perspective on things and help you move forward.

6. Examine your feelings

Was it love or attraction? Do you still like the person, or are you regretting that you couldn’t be together? It is crucial to figure out what you feel for them to stop liking them. By examining the depth of your feelings, you will be able to think rationally. You will realize whether they are worth crying over. Once you identify your emotions, the healing journey will be much simpler.

7. Keep away from any triggers that remind you of them

Certain things or activities can trigger the memories of the person you liked. It is

best to avoid all these triggers till you move on. If you have watched any TV series together and watching it again takes you back, stop watching it for a while. Keep away from any places you used to visit together that might remind you of them.

If you have any things in your possession that remind you of them, do away with that stuff. It may be a birthday card or the movie tickets you saved when you two went out together for the first time. Distancing yourself from these things can prevent you from obsessing over that person and make it difficult for you to move ahead.

8. Break all contact with them

If the person you like belongs to your social circle, workplace, or college, you are bound to run into them some time or the other. Seeing them often will make it difficult for you to move on.  It is best to distance yourself from them. If they belong to your social circle, avoid hanging out with mutual friends for a while. If they work with you or go to the same college, you can’t avoid meeting them but can ensure that the conversations between you are minimal.

Keep the interactions strictly professional. It is also essential to break virtual contact with them to distance yourself completely. Block their number and delete all messages from them. Do not call or message them.

9. Get back to the dating game

Having one person who didn’t reciprocate your feelings doesn’t mean you will not find someone who will. There are plenty of fish in the sea, and someone must be waiting for you. Jumping on the dating bandwagon again will help you find that person. It will also keep your thoughts away from your past and help you look into the bright future.

You don’t have to jump into a serious relationship immediately. Meet new people and go on a few casual dates. Dating someone new involves flirting, eating good food, and plenty of flattery. Playing this game will help you regain your confidence as well.

10. Let go of any resentment or anger

When the romantic feelings are not reciprocated, you feel hurt. But feeling strong negative emotions such as anger or resentment towards the person would pull you down. It doesn’t mean there is any problem with that person or you. Understand that if a person doesn’t feel the same way, they have a right to reject you. There is no point in being angry about it. Getting into the blame game or resentment will only hurt you more.

11. Remove them from all your social media platforms

It is tempting to keep checking the social media profile of the person you like. However, this behavior will not let you forget them. Seeing their photos and posts will remind you of them, disrupting any progress you make. Hence, it is best to unfollow them on all social media platforms. It might also be a good idea to delete any pictures or posts you have with them and get off the social media for a while. A bit of detox can help you find your bearings and forget about the past.

12. List down things that wouldn’t make you two a great fit

When you are infatuated with a person, you tend to look only at their good qualities and ignore their flaws. So, when your feelings remain unrequited, you might feel you lost them. However, by listing their negative traits, you might understand that they were not as perfect as their image in your mind.

The process will help you understand and, to some extent, rationalize that you two not being together was for the best. It will make the task of forgetting them a bit easier.

13. Start a workout regime

To forget someone and move on, you need to distract yourself. Working out is a great way to keep your mind occupied. Exercising releases endorphins that can uplift your mood and may help reduce depression. All your sad and negative thoughts will melt away. It also helps in bringing the stress down by decreasing the levels of the stress hormones (1). The pent-up frustration and anger over the situation will be released by doing an intense workout. You will feel refreshed and good about yourself after the session.

14. Give yourself some love

When someone you like doesn’t feel the same way, it can impact your self-confidence and self-worth. It is important to boost your confidence and remind yourself how amazing you are. Give yourself some much-needed love. Buy new clothes, gift yourself something you always wanted to own, change your look or get a spa and a massage. Do things that make you happy. Some pampering can help you regain your confidence and distract you from that person’s thoughts.

15. Get professional help

Forgetting someone you liked can be difficult. It can take some time to move past the pain. However, even after considerable time, if you still feel overwhelmed and are unable to move past the heartbreak, get some professional help. You can go to a therapist or join a support group to sort out your feelings. Talking to a professional can offer you a fresh perspective. They can help you process your emotions and let go of negative thoughts in your mind.

Frequently Asked Questions

1. When should I give up on liking someone?

If you recognize these signs, it’s time to give up on liking someone.

  • They talk about dating somebody else.
  • They never make an effort to contact you.
  • They regularly cancel plans.
  • They don’t acknowledge your feelings and emotions.
  • They make you question your self-worth.

2. Is it normal to randomly stop liking someone?

Yes, situations might arise where you would start losing interest in your crush and decide to move on. A few behaviors that may trigger this decision are constantly complaining, being inconsiderate, or disrespecting and making fun of others.

Disliking someone after having intense feelings for them is challenging. However, it is better to get over them than be a part of a one-sided relationship and keep hurting your feelings. If you ask yourself, “how to stop liking someone?” the first and foremost step is to accept reality and restrict the triggers that remind you of them. Next, try to deviate your thoughts about them by keeping your mind engaged or spending time with those who matter. Once you are comfortable again, put yourself out there to kindle new romances. If nothing seems to work, you can always seek professional help.

Key Pointers

  • If there is a lack of mutual admiration or liking towards each other, accept it and work on focusing on the bigger things in life.
  • The most tried and tested way of moving on is being more social and traveling.
  • To block them out of your life completely, try to do away with things that remind you of them.

References

1. Exercising to relax; Harvard Health Publishing
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Sharon Gilchrest O'Neill is a Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist and family business consultant, who has earlier been a graduate instructor/advisor, an organizational learning consultant, and hospice volunteer. With around eight years of experience working in the private as well as corporate setting, Sharon helps her clients think creatively and build upon their strengths.

Read full bio of Sharon Gilchrest O’Neill
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