11 Mistakes Every Married Couple Makes After Having Sex
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Believe it or not, there are things you could be doing after the intimate session that you’ve just shared that might be putting your partner off. Seriously, doing any one of these 11 things shows a certain lack of interest or gives away the fact that your mind was on something else entirely the whole time – a most off-putting thought for your husband or wife.
1. Passing Right Out
Please, no. I mean, we all know it can be a workout and that you’ve had a long day and everything, but come on. Take some time to revel with your partner in the post- coitus mood instead of murdering it by falling asleep immediately afterwards.
2. Going To Pee Right After
It just seems so… medical? Like we know it’s important, UTIs are no fun and sex is messy, but if you’re going to get up right after and rush off to the loo, don’t come back and expect us to get cozy after. It kills the mood dead right there.
[Read More: 13 Common Sex Mistakes You Didn’t Realize You Were Making]
3. Getting On The Phone
Candy Crush, WhatsApp or football forums, we don’t care. It just isn’t cool. It can be downright disrespectful, but obviously some of you will disagree. Look, I get that you’re an important person, but the most important person for you right now is next to you, so sort out your priorities!
4. Getting To Work
This one just seems insane. I mean, on one hand the first three may be indicative of relationships that need their spark reignited, but this one involves a person that either seriously needs to check out their priorities, or is in a really dark place at the moment. We wish you luck with both.
5. Sleeping In A Different Place
So you went to your study to review some documents (lame, by the way) and you ended up passing out on your rather large, extremely comfortable chair. I mean, you’re allowed one of these maybe every three-four months? Just don’t do this.
6. Letting The Kids Sleep Next To You
No.
[Read More: 13 Moves That Will Make You Look Like A Pro In Bed. Even If You Are Not]
7. Letting The Pets Sleep Next To You
See 6.
8. Putting On The Telly
Nothing kills the mood quite like some dim flickering light, sounds that are only ever comprised of mids, no highs or lows, and canned laughter. No we’re sorry there actually is one more thing that kills the mood faster, and that’s watching TV along with number 9.
9. Eating Something
God, no, please. The crumbs! They’re everywhere. One poor woman once complained that her husband ate sweets in bed after they had finished up, and the slow crinkling of the wrapper as he slowly proceeded to unwrap the sweets nearly drove them to divorce.
[Read More: 29 Wild Places To Have Sex Once In Your Life]
10. Having An Argument
Idiocy. Not that it’s a good thing to do at any other part of the day, unless you’re willing to go for round two (and even if you are), don’t argue right after you’re finished with the only thing that disarms such a situation.
11. Criticizing Their Performance
Unless you’re entirely confident that your marriage is entirely doomed to despair, do not criticize your partner’s performance right after they are finished, and if it’s genuinely that bad, express shock in a reassuring “that’s not you” manner, and not outright dissatisfaction and irritation. Talk to them in the middle of the day, wearing clothes. Go to therapy. Anything, but not this.
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