Is Modern Parenting Better Than Traditional? All You Need To Know

Written by Sakshi Wilson
Last Updated on

Ask any parent, and they’ll tell you that parenting is not easy. Raising a child and shaping them to be the best version of themselves can be overwhelming, challenging, and at times, impossible. We all strive to be amazing parents, but often, we doubt if we’re going about it the right way. As a parent, you are responsible for rearing your child, supporting their needs and wants, and hand-holding them till they are ready to leave the nest.

What makes parenting difficult is that it never is black and white. There are several schools of thought, which can make it very confusing. The two main styles of parenting are modern parenting and traditional parenting. The big question is, “Which one is better?”. Some parents swear by the modern route, while others are traditional parenting purists. Let’s see what each of them means and which one works best for you and your child!

1. What Is Traditional Parenting?

What Is Traditional Parenting
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In traditional parenting, a good amount of control is exercised over children. Children are expected to comply with their parents in this parenting style, and they often pose as authority figures. The prime focus of traditional parenting is on bringing up children to be responsible adults who, in turn, will contribute at large to society, passing on moral beliefs and values just as their parents did in their time. In most cases, parents who follow traditional parenting are loving and affectionate. However, they have an interesting characteristic — their affections are often accompanied by a sense of power and discipline to ensure obedience and submission.

Traditional parenting often involves strict boundaries and restrictions, and failing to comply would result in punishment. Considering all of this, it is safe to say that traditional parenting is non-flexible and rigid, leaving little space for democratic discussions, decision-making, and free communication on the part of children.

2. What Is Modern Parenting?

What Is Modern Parenting
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In contrast to traditional parenting, modern parenting is a lot more focused on the child’s feelings, interests, and needs. Here, children are considered individuals entitled to their own opinions, likes, and dislikes. As opposed to its traditional counterpart, the modern parenting system is flexible, permissive, and customizable, depending on the child. Restrictions and boundaries exist in modern parenting; however, when a child fails to comply, they aren’t punished harshly. Instead, parents make considerable efforts to understand why the child was unable to comply. They make the child understand that consequences will be there, but there will also be rewards for when they adhere to the reasonable expectations of their parents.

Parents who follow modern parenting believe that their children should respect rather than fear them. Additionally, they also think that children should have the liberty to explore and express themselves.

3. Traditional Parenting – What’s Right?

Traditional Parenting
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While it may seem that traditional parenting is akin to military school, the truth is that it enforces a sense of discipline and responsibility. Children are taught to respect authority, adhere to rules, and grow into polite, conscientious citizens (1).

Children who are products of traditional parenting are usually well-mannered, and the importance of education is given utmost priority, turning them into well-accomplished individuals. Disrespect, tantrums, and unacceptable behavior are not tolerated under traditional parenting, and these characteristics tend to stay with these children as they grow up .

4. Modern Parenting – What’s Right?

Modern Parenting - What's Right
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Modern parenting is a lot more flexible than traditional parenting. Often, these parents understand that each child is unique and make informed parenting choices for their children. What’s great about modern parenting is that children are seen as individuals who are allowed to make mistakes, and when they do, they are given a chance to learn from their downfalls.

Children who have been raised in this style of parenting are independent, thoughtful, and open-minded. They are taught to look at both sides of the coin, and empathy is a frontrunner in social interactions. This makes them sensitive, empathetic, tolerant adults.

Afterall, people have learnt from their earlier generations and observed the flaws that plagued them in parenting. Only through correcting those mistakes have we arrived at better ways of raising children today. Adhering to such old and inefficient ways of parenting would really prove detrimental to the growth and development of your child at times. Besides it would be hard on you too as often your ideals might clash with those of the current times.

5. Traditional Parenting And Modern Parenting: The Cons

Traditional Parenting And Modern Parenting
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Traditional parenting, as we mentioned above, can be very rigid and strict. Children raised in this style are often timid, scared to express themselves freely, and lack a sense of self. They may also struggle with forming social relationships. It is a lot easier for traditional parenting to lapse into uninvolved parenting. In such a case, parents tend to lack empathy, neglect their children’s needs and desires, and fail to build a healthy bond with them (2).

The drawback of modern parenting is that sometimes, the children are given excessive freedom, which can be misused. Additionally, this style of parenting can lapse into permissive parenting, leading to little to no boundaries, rules, or restrictions. When behaviors and actions are not regulated, children can develop behavioral issues in the long run. Also, modern parenting may lack a sense of discipline, which in turn can affect your child’s upbringing.

Now that we know what each parenting style entails, we’re free to conclude which one is better. Modern and traditional parenting have pros and cons; however, modern parenting seems to come out as the winner, given its belief that children are individuals with their own opinions, needs, and desires. In modern parenting, just like traditional parenting, we can teach children discipline and responsibility without treating them harshly. It is also essential to ensure that modern parenting doesn’t lapse into permissive parenting, as this can spoil your child in the long run. What type of parenting do you follow, and which one do you think is better? Let us know in the comments below!

References

  1. Parenting Styles: A Closer Look at a Well-Known Concept
    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC6323136/
  2. Parenting Dimensions and Styles: A Brief History and Recommendations for Future Research
    https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3746212/
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