Is It Safe To Have Sex During Pregnancy?

Written by K. Masthoff
Last Updated on

Did you know that around 50 out of 100 men desire their partners more when they are pregnant? So, if you are pregnant right now, and lusting for your partner, there is a high chance he feels the same way. However, sex during pregnancy is a topic of hot debate and rouses different opinions.

Do you wonder what your sex life would be like while you are pregnant? Is it safe to have sex during pregnancy? Will it harm your baby? These are questions that are lurking at the back of your mind, but you may not want to speak them out loud.

If that is the case, or you are just searching for some information about having sex during pregnancy, you needn’t worry anymore! Here, we unravel the mysteries and debunk the misconceptions of sex during pregnancy period. So, just sit back and read our post below.

Sex During Pregnancy:

Sex is essential to a healthy and loving relationship. So, it’s obvious that you will want as much information as possible about enjoying sex during pregnancy. Well, the answer is a resounding yes! You can have sex if you are pregnant, but it all depends on whether you have a safe and healthy pregnancy. However, you also should be prepared for changes in your sex life. It will not be the same as what it was before your pregnancy. The key is to be open with your partner so that you have a satisfying as well as safe sex life during your pregnancy.

As long as your pregnancy is going along healthily and you have no problems, you can have sex with your partner whenever you feel like it. However, you may notice your desire diminishing in the initial stages of your pregnancy, thanks to hormonal fluctuations, breast tenderness, nausea and fatigue [1].

Furthermore, as your baby starts growing, you will get back pain, gain more weight and also contend with other pregnancy-related symptoms. These may reduce your enthusiasm to enjoy sex.

It is prudent to remember your emotions also affect your libido. Your sex drive may diminish during your pregnancy because you will be concerned about how the pregnancy is progressing and also the way the arrival of a baby will change your relationship with your partner. This will happen even though you are looking forward to the arrival of your baby.

[ Read: Anal Sex During Pregnancy ]

Sex Drive During Pregnancy:

Throughout your pregnancy, you will notice a constant change in your sex drive and interest in sex. It’s because the rising and falling hormones in your body contribute to many changes and affect your body. Here we list some obvious changes:

1. First Trimester:

During early pregnancy, changes in your hormone levels and body shape will send your sex drive through the roof. You will feel incredibly sexy. However, the reverse also is true in some women. If you feel tired, experience morning sickness and have sore breasts, the last thing on your mind will be sex.

2. Second Trimester:

You will feel physically and emotionally better during the second trimester. The discomforts you experienced in the first trimester will be a distant memory. In this stage of pregnancy, your belly will be perceptible, but it will be small enough to have sex quite comfortably. In fact, you may want to have sex more often than you did in the past, to your partner’s delight! When you are pregnant, your blood volume increases. Most of that blood circulates below the waist. This additional blood flow may help you attain an orgasm quicker than normal, and don’t be surprised if you have multiple orgasms. Just remember if you have an orgasm, you will experience contractions in and around your vagina. This is normal and no cause for concern.

[ Read: Morning Sickness During Pregnancy ]

3. Third Trimester:

As you approach the end of your pregnancy, your interest in sex will diminish significantly. The big belly of yours will make it uncomfortable to have sex in traditional positions. During this stage, your mind will be occupied by the impending childbirth and ensuring your baby is healthy. This is completely normal, but you can still find ways to your partner to be close and loving without having sex.

Frequently Asked Questions About Sex During Pregnancy:

Here are some questions and their answers that all expectant mothers will want to know. They address concerns about sex during pregnancy.

1. Can Sex Harm Your Baby?

This perhaps is the most commonly asked question by pregnant women. Thankfully, you have no reason for concern, as your baby is completely protected within your uterus. The baby is surrounded by the amniotic fluid and sac. There also is a thick mucus plug at the entrance of the cervix to protect your baby from infections. Your partner’s penis does not penetrate that deep and will never come into contact with the growing baby.

[ Read: Contractions During Pregnancy ]

2. Can Sexual Intercourse Or Orgasm Lead to Miscarriage And Premature Contractions?

If your pregnancy is normally progressing and you have a low-risk pregnancy, sexual intercourse will not result in miscarriage or contractions. When you attain orgasm, you experience vaginal contractions. These are quite different from the contractions you get during labor. However, before you begin enjoying rampant sex, it is best to speak to your OB/GYN to make sure your pregnancy is normal and that it is alright for you to have sex.

There are some doctors who may not want women to have sex in the last few weeks of their pregnancy. This is for the sake of safety, as your partner’s semen contains chemicals that can stimulate contractions. Just follow your doctor’s instructions and you should be fine.

3. Is Sex Safe During Pregnancy?

It is natural that you will be worried about the wellbeing of your baby. There are many ways that you can make sex safe for yourself and your baby during your pregnancy.

  • Stay In A Monogamous Relationship: You can contract sexually transmitted diseases (STDs) from an infected partner [2]. STDs adversely affect the health of your baby during pregnancy and after birth. If your partner is diagnosed with an STD, refrain from sexual intercourse altogether. Also, do not have sex with a partner, who has other sex partners. This increases the likelihood of getting STDs.
  • Care During Oral Sex: If you have oral sex with your partner, make sure your partner does not blow air into your vagina. This can result in an air embolism [3]. Air embolism blocks blood flow and can lead to grave problems for your baby and you.
  • Speak To Your Doctor: Some couples opt for anal sex during pregnancy. However, it is not recommended, as the anus is filled with the disease- and infection-causing bacteria. If you have vaginal sex after anal sex, you could contract an infection. So, first consult with your OB/GYN before you decide to opt for anal sex. Your doctor will tell how you can enjoy sex safely, whether it is anal or vaginal sex.

[ Read: STDs During Pregnancy ]

4. When Is Sex Not Safe During Pregnancy?

There are several instances when sex is not safe during pregnancy. Usually, this occurs if you have pregnancy-related complications, or you experienced these complications during your previous pregnancies.

  • You are carrying twins, triplets or more babies
  • You suffered a miscarriage in the past
  • You are at a high risk of experiencing a miscarriage
  • You had a premature baby in the past
  • Your pregnancy shows signs and symptoms of preterm labor
  • You have an incompetent or insufficient cervix. This can result in preterm labor as the cervix opens prematurely
  • You have been diagnosed with Placenta Previa; wherein the placenta is placed too low in the uterus. This condition can result in severe bleeding and also other complications in the later stages of your pregnancy
  • The doctor has diagnosed a leakage in your amniotic fluid

There could be other issues during your pregnancy that prevents you from having sex. Make sure you listen to your doctor and follow her instructions.

[ Read: Causes Of Preterm Labor ]

5. Is It Okay To Have Oral and Anal Sex During Pregnancy?

Don’t feel guilty about enjoying oral sex during your pregnancy. Just remember to stop your partner from blowing air into your vagina when you indulge in oral sex. As mentioned earlier, it could lead to life-threatening air embolism in your blood vessels.

There is some debate about anal sex during pregnancy. Some doctors may be okay with it while others may ask you refrain from anal sex to prevent the spread of harmful bacteria from your rectum to your vagina. Also, you may not enjoy anal sex if you suffer from hemorrhoid brought on by your pregnancy.

Whether you opt for anal or oral sex, the choice is completely yours. However, consult your OB/GYN to make sure your pregnancy is normally proceeding . Once you get the go-ahead from your doctor, there is no reason to worry.

[ Read: Placenta Previa During Pregnancy ]

6. Which Sex Positions Are Advisable During Pregnancy?

Traditional sex positions may be uncomfortable during the initial stages of pregnancy or unsafe as your pregnancy progresses. However, this should not stop you from exploring other positions. If you find lying on your back uncomfortable, don’t worry. There are several other positions you can try to find one that best suits your needs and comfort levels.

  • Spooning: In this position, you lie sideways, and your partner lies behind you. This reduces the pressure exerted on your abdomen.
  • Woman On Top: Since the missionary position (you lying flat on your back) is uncomfortable after the fourth month of your pregnancy; you can opt for this position. It allows you to dictate the speed and penetration so that you can enjoy the intercourse without any discomfort.
  • Woman On Hands And Knees: This position is apt during your first and second trimesters, as it reduces pressure on your abdomen. However, it will be uncomfortable once your stomach gets bigger in size. You will not be able to get on your hands and knees with a huge belly.

7. Is It Normal To Experience Cramps Or Contractions After Sexual Intercourse or Orgasm During Pregnancy?

Your partner’s semen contains chemicals called prostaglandins. This can trigger uterine contractions. However, research shows having sex during pregnancy time is unlikely to cause labor. There is another school of thought that believes prostaglandins can induce labor if you have reached the full term of your pregnancy or are passed your due date [4]. This is because the gel that doctors use to ripen the cervix and induce labor also contains prostaglandins.

Prostaglandins cause your uterus to contract. However, these contractions are temporary and harmless. So, you have no reason to worry that sex or orgasm could trigger preterm labor. But if the contractions don’t stop after some time, it is best to contact your doctor immediately.

8. Should You Use Condoms During Sexual Intercourse?

Since you have already conceived, there is no reason to use protection during sexual intercourse. This could heighten your sex drive, and you may enjoy sex without having to worry about protection and birth control.

Typically, couples are in a monogamous relationship and don’t have multiple sex partners. So, the chances of sexually transmitted diseases are minimal. However, if your relationship is not a monogamous one, it is advisable to use a condom during sexual intercourse. This is the only way to protect yourself and your baby from the harmful effects of a sexually transmitted disease. You should also use a condom if you take on a new sex partner during your pregnancy.

9. When Should You Call A Doctor?

If you have a low-risk pregnancy with no complications, it is perfectly safe to have sex. However, if you notice something out of the ordinary, like bleeding, discharge from the vagina or pain that does not subside, call your OB/GYN immediately. If your contractions continue long after sex, it indicates a problem, and you shouldn’t delay calling your doctor.

Be Prepared for Increase And Decrease In Your Sex Drive:

If you notice an increase or decrease in your sex drive during your pregnancy, don’t get alarmed. As mentioned previously, you may see a reduction in your libido during the first trimester because of pregnancy-related symptoms, such as nausea, breast tenderness and fatigue. And, not wanting to have sex while you are feeling physically miserable is perfectly normal.

On the other hand, you will no longer have to worry about contraceptives. This could spur your libido in the second trimester. So, you may notice an increase in your sex drive. Also, pregnancy tends to bring partners closer. This helps make sex more exciting and fulfilling. Be prepared for your sex drive to wane during the third trimester, as the reality of your pregnancy will finally sink in.

Your Partner’s Sex Drive Also Matters:

Just like you notice an increase and decrease in your sex drive, your partner too will experience the same changes. Your partner may notice an increase in his sex drive watching the changes taking place in your body. But it also is possible the burden of impending parenthood and concerns about your health, and that of the baby may diminish your partner’s libido.

Some men may also find it difficult to visualize their partners as sex partners during pregnancy. If your partner feels like that, it is perfectly normal, and there is nothing wrong with you or him. It is important to communicate and speak what troubles or worries you. You should encourage your partner to do the same. This will forge a healthy relationship and also bring you closer so that you can deal with such issues together instead of feeling isolated.

[ Read: Are Vibrators Safe During Pregnancy ]

Ways To Be Close To Your Partner Without Sex:

While sex is an important part of a healthy relationship, it is not the be all and end all of your relationship. There are many other ways to be intimate with your partner without having sex. Some ways you can be close are as follows:

  • Kissing and holding hands
  • Cuddling up when you are watching TV or lying in bed
  • Oral sex
  • Mutual masturbation, when you and your partner touch yourselves to attain orgasm
  • A massage is an excellent way to get intimate. Just give each other gentle rubs. In fact, you will find the massage great for your back pain and as a stress reliever

Make sure you keep the channels of communication open. It is important you speak to your partner openly and honestly about your needs and encourage him to do the same. This will pave the way for a loving, stronger and healthier relationship. If something does not feel right or you want to change it, let your partner know. As a result, your partner will understand your feelings and keep your comfort and pleasure foremost in mind.

[ Read: Oral Sex During Pregnancy ]

Is It Normal Not To Want To Have Sex During Pregnancy?

If you don’t feel like having sex while pregnant, don’t worry! It is completely normal and okay. Don’t let the guilt eat you up. There is more to a relationship than sexual intercourse. If you find sex unappealing and uncomfortable, or your doctor has asked you to refrain from sexual intercourse during pregnancy, use the ways above to enjoy contact and closeness with your partner.

Just let your partner know what you want and this will go a long way in easing your stress and confusion about not wanting to have sex.

How Soon Can You Resume Your Sex Life After Giving Birth?

Now that you know all about sex during pregnancy, it is time to look at sex after childbirth. You shouldn’t resume sex for about six weeks after having your baby. During this time, your body heals and recovers from the rigors of childbirth.

When you start having sex again, remember to use birth control. Consult your doctor before you start using the contraceptive. It should be safe for your baby as you will be breastfeeding. Remember after giving birth, you will notice a few changes in your body that may impact your sex life.

1. Vaginal Dryness:

You may experience vaginal dryness due to hormonal changes and breastfeeding. You can overcome this by using a lubricant or gel.

2. Reduced Pleasure:

Since your vaginal muscles may become weak after giving birth, you may not find sex as pleasurable as you used to. You can strengthen the muscles by doing Kegel exercises. This involves squeezing your muscles to stop urine flow and hold that position for about 8 to 10 seconds. Doing it 10 to 20 times, three times a day, can help make your vaginal muscles and pelvic floor strong [5].

3. Lower Sex Drive:

A newborn baby means many sleepless nights. You will be too tired and stressed out to think about sex. This can result in reduced sex drive and is completely normal. So, don’t worry. Try to get as much rest as possible. If necessary, ask family and friends to help out. When you feel rested, your sex drive will get a boost. However, if you feel you are not ready for sex, be honest with your partner. You can use the same methods that you used during your pregnancy to be close and intimate with your partner.

[ Read: Bacterial Infection During Pregnancy ]

In Conclusion:

If your pregnancy is a healthy one and deemed low risk, you have no reason to worry. You can have sex during your pregnancy. It will not harm your baby, as the penis cannot penetrate the cervix or touch the baby. Also, it is completely normal for your sex drive to change throughout the nine months of your pregnancy.

When you are pregnant, you will be focusing more on caring for the developing baby. So, you may not have the urge to enjoy sex. Don’t feel guilty about it. Just let your partner know how you feel and together you can look for other ways to stay close and be intimate.

Usually, women are uncomfortable talking about sex during pregnancy. This is because the changed role – from a woman to an expectant mother – can result in embarrassment. However, you should openly speak to your doctor about your concerns. Remember your OB/GYN is the best source for correct information. There are some doctors who address sex during pregnancy without the patient asking while others wait for the patient to broach the topic. So, if you have concerns, doubts or worries, speak honestly to your partner and doctor. Most healthcare practitioners agree a woman should listen to her body and be open with her partner when it comes to sex during pregnancy. Pregnancy is a beautiful phase in your life, but so is the sexual relationship you have with your partner. It is possible to enjoy the best of both worlds without feeling guilty.

What were your experiences during pregnancy? Did you speak to your doctor about sex during pregnancy or were you too embarrassed to talk about it? We would love to hear from you.

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