4 Important Tips To Become A Peaceful Parent

Written by MomJunction
Last Updated on

They say that becoming a parent is one of the biggest joys of your life. What they conveniently forget to mention, though, is that it is also one of the most stressful experiences of your life.

Being a parent truly has its perks and its awesome moments, but admit it, there are times you feel you could bring down a wall with all the pent-up anger and frustration inside. So, if you would like to understand the concept of peaceful parenting and know more about how you can become a peaceful parent read on.

The Concept Of Being A Peaceful Parent:

As a parent, you have your good days and bad ones, and it is during the latter that you fear your anger and your frustration can get the better of you. The entire concept of becoming a peaceful parent is to learn how to control your anger and frustrations, even when you don’t think you can. Instead of taking out your anger on your kids, you learn to find different ways to channelize your emotions and give them a healthier outlet. Here are a few ideas that will better sum up the concept of peaceful parenting:

  • As a peaceful parent, you will always stop and think about your feelings and actions before you act. It means that instead of getting angry about something that your child did, you will first try to understand why your child may have done it.
  • One of the theories of peaceful parenting is to connect before you correct. It means that, in order to become a peaceful parent, you will try more ways to connect with your child, instead of only trying to correct him.
  • As a parent who wants to follow the peaceful parenting discipline, you will first take responsibility for your emotions. You will not blame your child for the emotions that you feel, such as anger, irritation, frustration and the like. Instead, you will look at how you can best deal with your emotions and stay as calm as you can while dealing with your child.
  • In case your child is going through a tough phase while growing up, you will look at it as part of transitioning from the child to the grown-up stage. You will not only deal with your emotions but also help your child cope with many emotions, which can often be confusing.
  • You will try to react to your child with as much love and compassion as you can. Instead of criticizing her actions, you will react with understanding, acceptance and love. You will look at the entire parenting experience as one where both you and your child can learn and grow together.

[ Read: Anger Management Tips For Parents ]

Tips On How To Become A Peaceful Parent:

You can become a peaceful parent only when you start practicing the tenets of peaceful behavior within yourself. While parenting is surely something you will do together with your child, the first few steps have to be within you. Here are a few tips that can help you become a more peaceful parent and practice the teachings of peaceful parenting:

1. Take Charge Of Your Emotions:

Start by taking responsibility for your emotions and understanding them, as and when you feel them. It means that if you feel you are getting a little upset about something and are about to get angry, stop right there and take charge of your emotions. Take a deep breath and keep breathing in and out, regulating your breathing pattern. Take deep and slow breaths and feel yourself fill up with air. Count till three and slowly breathe out. Feel the air calm you down and bring down your anger levels. Another great way to stop your anger right there is to stop yourself from reacting when you feel angry. Instead, count very slowly from one to ten, and then back again from ten to one. If you still feel angry, repeat the process.

[ Read: Attachment Parenting ]

2. Connect With Your Child:

Instead of immediately reacting to what your child did or said, focus on connecting more as a parent. It will let you understand your child’s feelings and know why she does or says what she does. If you connect well with your child, you will need fewer threats and punishments to make her do what you feel is best for her. Once you form a connection, you will be in a much better position regarding a parent and child relationship. Your child will know that you are always concerned about her well-being and, as a result, she should listen to what you say. You too will learn how to read your child’s thoughts and emotions, and deal in a more open and accepting manner.

[ Read: Slow Parenting ]

3. Explain Instead Of Instructing:

A great way to start following the peaceful parenting concept with your child is to start explaining instead of always telling your child what she should do. The ‘explain instead of instruct’ philosophy means that you should let your child see the reason behind the rules or practices you want her to follow. Also, if you explain to her why you want her to do something, there are better chances of her following the same, instead of refusing. Tell your child that you want to solve all the problems together, as a team. Also, once you have learned to take better control of your emotions, ask your child if she noticed any change in your behavior. You can help her by telling her that now you have started yelling less at her, so why not try and discuss more instead?

[ Read: Holistic Parenting Tips ]

4. Expect Your Child’s Emotions:

You know that as a parent, you are prone to feeling many different types of emotions. The same is also true for your child. Understand that your child too will go through her set of emotions, which means she will also feel upset, confused, angry, irritable and more. While you are trying to deal with your emotions and handle them better, keep your expectations from your child real. Understand that she too will react to what you say and do, so be more understanding and help her deal with her emotions as you deal with yours.

Parenting is teamwork, and you need your child’s cooperation. Peaceful parenting can help you become more approachable to your child and keep the channels of communication open. Also, as you lead by example, it will also teach your child to be calmer and deal better with everyday situations.

Moms, have you ever heard of peaceful parenting? Do you think your parenting style is more peaceful or stressful? Tell us about it here.

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