Why All Women Deserve Better Than Being ‘The Almost Girlfriend’
saumya gaur 
This is not going to be a cautionary tale or a rant piece where we mope about how women are such poor, naïve gazelles who are easily led astray by the conniving men and then left to hang dry. No, we aren’t going to go down that route today. Instead, we are going to discuss something that forms a part of our human experience on this planet, we are going to discuss relationships. As a member of a group, that forms one half of the human population on this planet (forgive the long-winding route) I want to talk about my experience of being one of them, and mind you I have had my fair share of them.
As a woman, I have been in many relationships, umm but not the kind you’re thinking of but we’ll get there. I have been a sister, a mother-figure, a friend, a mentor, an aunt – everything, and to these relationships, I would like to add one more. This relationship has no counterpart in the male universe and the title that I am accorded in this relationship is that of “the almost girlfriend”. Get it? No? Then let me explain.
Being an almost-girlfriend is like being the second person to climb the Everest, you climbed it but no one knows your name or even bothers that you exist, but the sum total of your existence is that you, in fact, did climb the Everest and you never fail to mention it to people around you. And in the little commiserating sessions that I have with my fellow sistren, I have come to realize that we all have been graced with that distinction at some point in our lives. So instead of sitting around cursing our miserable fate, I decided that enough was enough and compiled a list of reasons explaining why we women deserve better than the tag of an almost conquest. Read on and choose one for yourself!
1. You Don’t Want To Waste Your Time Over Someone Who Can’t Make Up Their Minds
Much like the Katy Perry song, he is hot then he is cold. He is yes and then he is no. All this back and forth gives you no sense of security in your relationship. It seems when you’re with him you are always looking over your shoulder. The stress and uncertainty cast a pall of gloom over whatever good time you do spend with each other. This has all the makings of a pretty dramatic relationship, only you can’t call it a relationship yet. So why else are you putting in that much effort?
2. You Might Be Missing Out On Actual Good Partners
While your boy here has kept you busy while he “figures” things out. Your actual knight in shining armor is getting tired of all the waiting. Since you are still waiting for things to turn around, you do everything a committed person does in an actual relationship. You don’t even look around for the fear of driving away an almost boyfriend who is a flight risk. Amidst all this drama you could have actually found a decent guy for yourself who respected you, your time, and your life. Just saying, it’s not too late to jump the ship!
3. You Can’t Put Your Life On Hold
You’ve met his parents and he has met yours, still, the “almost” tag is firmly attached to your relationship status. The status update on Facebook “It’s complicated” signifies the entire schematics of your relationship. It seems that while everyone around you is moving ahead in their lives you are frozen in time. No anniversaries for you, nor are there any weddings or baby showers in your future. Why would you want to put your life on hold for a person who can’t even acknowledge your presence and importance in his life?
4. No Label Is Better Than An Almost-Label
A relationship is more than just a way of fulfilling your carnal desires. It’s a commitment, it’s a promise, it’s a way of living your life by being dedicated to one person. So if your “almost” relationship fails to live up to these benchmarks, then call it for what it is – a fling. Don’t be fearful of that tag. If both of you are in it for bodily pleasures then reset your expectations accordingly.
Having a no-strings-attached relationship is thousand times better than one where you are pining away for him to spend the evening with you while he is oblivious to your presence in his life.
5. Girl, You Deserve Better!
You’re an accomplished woman. You are a kind-hearted, compassionate, intelligent, and gorgeous human being. You have so many gifts. Why are you wasting them on someone who doesn’t value them?
You deserve better than the secondary treatment that is meted out to you, where you rank much lower than everything in the totem pole of his priorities. Respect the person you are, and move on.
Hope I managed to shake you out of your reverie. If there ever was a perfect time to seize the day, it’s today, in fact, right now. So don’t waste a minute of your life on someone who is not worth it. Have you ever been an almost-girlfriend? Share your experience with us in the comments section.
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