Co-Sleeping With My Kid: Is It Safe
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All parents have their own opinion on co-sleeping. And be it your saving grace or your worst nightmare, we can’t help but notice that when it does work, there’s nothing like it. But co-sleeping does come with its own share or risks, which is why it’s important to investigate just how safe this sleeping arrangement is, if it’s sustainable and what parents can do to make the experience safer for their little ones. Although we know that cuddling up to your baby at night is the most magical feeling in the world, it might be time to compromise on the coddling so that everyone is safe and sound, especially when they’re asleep. Safe co-sleeping or room sharing as it’s more accurately known doesn’t involve your kids sharing your bed with you. Instead they sleep in their own crib while still being in the same room as you. This can also be in the form of a bassinet attached to your bed when your baby is a newborn. But what does this new kind of co-sleeping entail and what are its benefits? Let’s find out!
What Are The Benefits Of Co-sleeping?
Like most research, research on co-sleeping can be swayed one way or another depending on what the specific study is trying to prove or disprove. However, a study done in Brazil in 2017 found that “persistent bed-sharers”, that is, children who have consistently co-slept with their parents since babyhood were at increased odds of presenting psychiatric disorders and internalizing problems, compared with children who never co-slept. But in this research bed sharing was referred to as “habitual sharing of the bed between child and the mother”, which is not the kind of co-sleeping we are talking about (1). Contrary to this claim, proponents of gentle parenting and attachment parting cite research indicating that kids who fall asleep next to their parents are prone to fall asleep faster and stay asleep for longer periods of time (2). And additionally, parents who co-sleep with their child are shown to have gotten more sleep as well.
But irrespective of all the research that has been skewed in one direction or another, it’s safe to say that only a parent can make the choice to co-sleep with their child. You must make your own judgment call to determine if you and your baby are safely co-sleeping by adhering to the safe co-sleeping guidelines.
At What Age Is Co-sleeping Safe?
Many parents wonder at what age they can allow co-sleeping and when it’s time to stop. We’ve all been in a scenario when our pouty 3 year old came into the room in the middle of the night and demanded to sleep next to you because they couldn’t sleep. And it’s so difficult to send them back. So if you caved and let them crawl into bed with you, that’s okay. It’s perfectly safe for your toddler to sleep next to you, as long as you understand that they don’t have the same sleep cycle of an adult. For toddlers and young school-age children, the deepest sleep usually occurs early in the evening, well before mom and dad’s bedtime, so co-sleeping can get disruptive for both parent and child at this stage. However co-sleeping with a baby is another story. This is a great way to bond and spend more time with your little one. And it’s safe if they are in a bassinet by your bed and not on the bed right next to you. This way you can enjoy more cuddles while you feed them at night and catch up on way more sleep because you won’t be moving around as much. In fact, you won’t even need to fully wake up in order to breastfeed them at 2am!
How To Put An End To Toddler Co-sleeping?
If you’re a parent desperately looking for a way to reclaim your territory and finally have the full use of your own bed, then establishing a good nighttime routine is your best bet. A consistent sleep routine that starts in your child’s own room is a great starting point to putting an end to the co-sleeping days once and for all. This routine can include a few songs as they brush their teeth, a night bath, putting on their pajamas, reading a bedtime story to them and handing them their favorite snuggly toy. If your kids have slept next to you for forever, then it’s going to take more than a few days and songs to convince them to sleep alone. You might have to lie on the floor for a few minutes or stay until they fall asleep for a couple of weeks, until they’re reading to get tucked in and left alone.
No matter where you stand on the co-sleeping front, it’s important to ask yourself if it is the right move for you and for your child before you start to practice it. But until then, keep your options open and stay safe!
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