How To Fix A Broken Marriage With Your Husband
Chaitra has a triple main bachelor’s degree in journalism, communicative English, and economics from St. Aloysius College, Mangalore, and a master’s degree in journalism and mass communication from St. Joseph's College, Bengaluru.
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We grew up listening to fairytales about Cinderella, Snow White, and Belle, didn’t we? What did these stories have in common? Well, all these beautiful girls found their happy ending upon finding their prince. The writers of these fairytales probably stopped it there because they didn‘t want us to know how the dreamy couples fought in their castles. It’s only after a few years of being in a relationship or marriage that reality strikes. And things are no longer the way they were!
Sometimes, the rough phase lasts a lot longer than the sugar-dipped one. You may feel that there’s no spark left in your marriage anymore, or that your husband just doesn’t love you like before. Well, magic can’t fix the broken marriage for you, you need to work hard to find a fix. Before you start thinking about the “D” word, give yourself, your partner, and your marriage another chance.
Here are some things that you need to keep in mind if you want to fix a broken marriage:
Never Let Go Of The Golden Memories
Remember the first time you met him? The first time he told you he liked you? The first date? The first kiss? These are the golden memories that you can never forget. No matter how bad the situation is right now, refreshing these memories will help you want to stay a little longer with him.
Talk to him about your wedding day and how amazing it was. Maybe, he will feel the love just the way you do and want to work things out. If he doesn’t, don’t give up, you might just have to try a little harder.
Listen More Than You Talk
One of the worst things that can happen to a relationship is to stop paying heed to your partner’s talks. In the beginning, you want to know more about the other person and you keep asking questions. But as time passes, it becomes more of like a one-sided conversation wherein you’re going on and on whether or not your partner really wants to know about it or has anything to say too. You focus more on what he should know about you and forget about what he wants to hear or say. Remember, both of you are important and it’s necessary to find a balance.
The best thing to do in such situations is to make a conscious effort to listen. If he’s talking about a baseball player you have no clue about, try to listen and respond to him. You may not like talking about it but he does and you should go along at least to some extent. And if you want to talk about Kylie Jenner and her new makeup products, he should listen too. I know it’s not great, but c’mon, we all need to loosen the screw a bit.
Identify The Main Problem
A broken marriage is the end result of a hundred thousand fights that probably revolve around the same core issue. No matter what you fight for, there is that one problem that always comes up. What is it? Is it your constant complaining or is it his lack of involvement? It can be something as silly as not sharing the TV remote equally.
Solving the core issue will help resolve most of the fights. It’s not practical to expect that you’ll never fight again but with the core issue resolved, the fights will be less severe.
Spending Quality Time Together
Keep aside your work, your friends, and even your family members for a while. Your marriage is falling apart! Aren’t you hearing the bells inside your head? This is the time when you need to spend more time with your partner even if you feel like punching him every now and then.
You can plan picnics, dinners, movie nights, and even a second honeymoon! Men love it when their partners are enthusiastic and full of energy. Of course, it’s too much to do when you have work and family to handle. But right now, this is what you need.
Be Patient
Your partner may not reciprocate your love and the effort that you’re putting in to save your marriage. Men are different and while some of them will jump on board with you the moment you tell them about your plans, others may fall asleep while you’re still talking. This doesn’t mean that they’re bad. They’re just men and they are difficult. Be patient because they will understand your effort and thank you for it soon.
If your partner truly loves you and still wants you in his life, he is going to do everything that’s in his hands to bring back the spark in your marriage.Talking about what are your expectations from each other and understanding the things that you absolutely despise will help a lot in this process.
Did you ever experience a rough patch in your marriage? How did you deal with the problems that came up? Feel free to share your thoughts and tips with us in the comments section below.
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