Teach Your Toddler How To Take A “NO” For An Answer

Written by Sadiya Qamar
Last Updated on

Picture this: you are outdoors with your toddler at a place where a toy store happens to be in the vicinity. Heavens be blessed if you come out of that ‘zone’ unscathed – that is, without buying a toy and not enduring your toddler’s tantrum. We’re sure most of the parents who have toddlers at home know what we mean. Your little one will never take a ‘No’ for an answer, come what may! So, how do we deal with this? Is giving in each time the right solution? Of course not! But before we get to the solution, we need to figure out the root cause.

The Root To Your Toddler’s Tantrums

Does your child often lose his/her temper over not getting your mobile to play with? If yes, then let’s rewind a bit. When was the first time your little one actually got exposed to the idea of playing with the phone? Who did it? Parents often resort to giving gadgets to kids, who are at times just a year or two old, to quieten them in a jiffy. As new-age parents, we are generally pressed for time and not in a position to patiently handle our kids. A similar situation arises when we’re out with the baby. On spotting a toy or a snack, the baby would’ve thrown a tantrum. And what would we do? We’d promptly give in to the demand because ‘everyone is watching us’! Having set a precedent like this, how can we expect the little ones to take a ‘No’ easily, just like that?

Here’s What To Do

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Image: Shutterstock

If you’ve already done what we’ve discussed above, we’re afraid that some damage has already been done. But have a heart, there’s always a way around. Here are a few ground rules you can follow:

Early Conditioning: Feeding is the only demand of your baby that you need to give in to. Barring this, gradually set the tone for your baby that not every demand of him/her will be accepted. When your child starts articulating, start explaining what a ‘Yes’ and ‘No’ means. Using hand gestures helps a lot too.

Patience Is The Key: Patience, patience, and lots of it. Prepare yourself for hours of bawling and incessant crying. Never lose your cool. Rather, figure out ways to distract and calm your toddler. It may take you a while, but you’ll soon master the art. Know that toddlers don’t throw a fit immediately, but rather it is a gradual build up. When you sense it coming, nip it in the bud.

Avoid The Triggers: If you wish to avoid a public meltdown, keep the outings to a minimum or short durations. Avoid areas that can trigger a tantrum – like a toy store or a bakery. At home, store trigger objects away from the sight so it doesn’t become a cause of a tantrum.

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Image: IStock

Engage With Your Child: Toddlers do understand if you talk to them. When your kid is his/her usual self, talk to him/her and explain the reason behind your ‘No’ beforehand. Explain that hearing a ‘No’ is not a negative thing always. For instance, you can discuss how too many donuts or chocolates are harmful to the teeth, etc.

It’s Okay To Give In Occasionally: If you find a particular situation going out of hand despite your efforts, it’s okay to give in to your toddler’s demand occasionally. However, take it as an opportunity to make your child understand how his/her stubborn behavior was unacceptable. Believe it or not, toddlers are extremely image-conscious. If they realize that certain behavior is projecting them in a bad light, they’ll go out of the way to correct themselves.

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Image: Shutterstock

A Hug Always Works: There are times when your child might genuinely feel bad for not getting what he/she wants. And you know that it was only in his/her best interest. In such situations, make sure you give some TLC to your child. A warm hug, a back rub, and some sweet talk will surely cheer them up. Try to make up for it by cooking their favorite dish at home or spending some quality play time.

We hope these tips help your child in understanding and accepting a ‘No’ positively. Have you too applied any of your own hacks to help your child? If yes, do share with us and enlighten the rest of the parents!

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