Why The Real Test Isn’t Falling In Love, It’s Staying In Love
shivani k 
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Falling in love is something that we can never plan. For some, it’s a series of events, for others it happens at a snail’s pace and there are a few lucky ones who fall in love in just a couple of moments. To fall in love is the most cherishable part of a relationship, don’t you all agree? The cute surprises, the late-night phone calls, the cozy coffee dates, the little pecks on your cheeks when you’re least expecting it, all of this leads us to conclude that the first leg of love which is “falling in love” is an ideal time which you’d never want to end. In short, falling in love isn’t under your control. Love hormones like oxytocin have got a role to play. It’s these hormones that signal you about that one touch, that one glance, you know, the way it’s portrayed in movies.
Staying In Love Is Where The Alarms Set Off
This is something that is definitely under our control, it’s our choice. It’s almost like the universe played its part by showing you the road. And now, it’s up to you to make the best of the journey and reach the destination along with your partner. It’s quite human to be awe-struck with the person you love. But, as you start spending time with them, you get a fair idea about their flaws as well. That’s where the real test begins. You start wondering how you never noticed these flaws earlier. But hey, each one of us has our own flaws, none of us are perfect, right? So, you think your partner’s dressing sense isn’t up to the mark? Go ahead and help them groom themselves better. It takes effort from both the sides to stay in love and make it work.
They Aren’t Gods, There’s No Way They’ll Know What You’re Going Through
If there’s one big blunder that Bollywood movies or the Indian daily soaps have made in their romantic flicks, it’s the portrayal of ‘telepathy’. You know, the way two people who are in love magically come to know what’s on each other’s minds even when they are miles apart? Yeah, we call it a bluff. Like seriously! What on earth were they even thinking while writing the scripts? Please make a note or take it as a disclaimer that it’s not the case in real life. There’s no way your partner will know what you’re going through unless and until you tell them. (Maybe, occasionally, they can guess what’s on your mind, but that’s a rarity) Transparency about each other’s thoughts is essential for a healthy relationship. It helps you build trust and improve communication.
That Compulsory “Good Morning” or “Good Night” Message Shouldn’t Matter
Okay, so you might be a freelance writer who obviously works on his/her own terms. Therefore, you definitely have the time and liberty to check your phone every now and then, or at least once in an hour. But, on the other hand, your partner might be working in a strict organization where there’s so much work that s/he cannot even glance at their phone, even once in the entire day. Odds are that, as soon as they come home, they might just hit the sack and fall asleep without sending a “good night” or a “love you” message. In such cases, it’s not right to lose your temper and pick a fight with your partner. Instead, make time for each other on weekends, or get together and cook, watch a movie, etc. To stay in love is also a lot of work, peeps!
To Love Your Partner Also Means To Love Your Partner’s Family
If luck’s not on your side, your partner’s family might dislike the same qualities that your partner loves in you. It happens, right? They might not like your outgoing nature which your partner was attracted to. That doesn’t mean you give up. You either need to put up with such differences or brush them aside. You need to take that leap of faith with your partner and work it out together. There’s always a middle road. Use your love as a compass and go figure that road out.
Remember That You Both Are Two Different People
To be in love doesn’t mean that you and your partner mirror each other’s opinions. Having things in common is a good sign. But, having everything in common can make you both very saturated too. It’s always nice to know and explore each other’s world. If there’s a clash of opinions or views, agree to disagree. Don’t rush to end what’s between you guys. Patience and endurance are of utmost importance when in love with a person.
Your partner and you will have to deal with a lot of differences – Personal differences, family differences or even lifestyle differences. Whenever a storm comes knocking, always remember that there was a reason for you to fall in love with your partner in the first place. Keep that love alive and make use of that love to solve all the problems. After all, what’s love without a few ups and downs, right?
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