Should I Worry About Spoiling My Baby?

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If you ask my eldest one about spoiled kids, she would start giving a list of examples of how one kid in her class got an SUV for her 14th birthday or this kid whose parents gave her a shopping spree of 10,000 rupees! The word spoiled is thrown around so many times so carelessly by everyone I know. And if you’re worried about spoiling your baby, please don’t be. You cannot spoil a baby. The reason being it’s a baby. I have heard advice from my parents and relatives to let the baby cry for a while before picking her up. Or don’t quickly rush to her at every single cry. But being a mother of 2, I can tell you that babies need you. They are tiny humans who are incapable of doing things on their own. They need your love, care, and attention. So, let no one tell you otherwise.

DON’T Let Him/Her Cry A Little

If your baby is crying, and your instinct is to go and pick him up even if it’s the 100th time that he had cried that day, do that. Baby’s cry to communicate their needs. He/she might be crying because of hunger, a wet diaper or because they need you.

Your baby isn’t trying to “manipulate you” by crying. My baby used to cry for about 2-3 hours in the first few months after birth. She cries if she’s hungry or wearing a dirty diaper. She also cried when she was lonely or uncomfortable. Babies can let you know something only by their cries. Sometimes it took me a while to understand why she was crying. I have been told by my relatives that I’m spoiling her too much. Or that I should just “let her cry a little.” But leaving her alone was only going to make things worse for both of us. Her cries would become louder, and it would take me a lot longer to calm her down. Also, by giving prompt attention to your baby, you’re letting them know they’re cared for and loved. Their self worth will increase and they’ll also start to feel more secure around you.

I have also heard people saying not to hold your baby too much. Holding your baby not only enforces the bond you share with them, but they also feel warm and secure. Whenever I held my baby in my arms, she seemed to be calm and happy. And you aren’t going to be able to hold them in your arms for long. So enjoy and cherish every time that you can.

How To Calm Your Baby When They Cry

How To Calm Your Baby When They Cry
Image: IStock

If you are in the middle of a crying episode from your baby, first make sure that it’s not because of hunger or a wet diaper. If you cannot find a reason behind the crying, try these techniques:

  • Rock your baby in a chair
  • Sway him/her from one side to another
  • Try gentle strokes on the head. Or pat the back or chest
  • Play slow music
  • Try singing or talking in a soothing voice
  • Take your baby outside or for a short drive
  • Try burping him/her to relieve the excess gas
  • Bring him/her close to a rhythmic or vibrating sound

So, the next time your bambino cries, try these methods to see what works best. For me, just taking her out in my garden was enough to calm her down. And if that wouldn’t work (which happens rarely) I’d sing to her in a soothing voice. It takes a few minutes of work but gets the job done.

I became more selective about responding to my child’s needs once she was 9 months old. If they seem to be crying to get their way with something, that’s when you draw a line and set some rules. Although it’s okay to give in to their cries every once in a while, make sure you stand your ground the rest of the time. If they resort to whining or temper tantrums, let them know why they cannot get their way in a calm manner. Raising your voice and shouting back at them isn’t going to work in your favor (it never did in mine).

So, what are you waiting for? Go hold your baby and hug them to your heart’s content. Be there whenever they cry or call for you. Sing a lullaby, cuddle or kiss them, and don’t worry about spoiling anymore.

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